What’s the point?

I can’t dream

or hope

or wish

Anymore.

What’s the point

of dreaming

of hoping with

all

my

heart

when

They only

add up to

nothing?

Mashed Up Feelings

I know that one day,
Some day,
You will destroy me,
You will rip out my heart,
And shatter it with your pitiless soul,
And leave me broken,

As I once was.
Though I know this,
I cannot help but feel,
So happy, inside,
But part of me,
Oh, that awful part of me,
Cries out in endless pain.

Perhaps it is because I am scared,
Of the pain I may feel,
When I’m close to the end,
And you destroy me completely.

You will tear apart my soul,
Leave it in tatters,
And brutally murder me,
But I do not care.

Is it fear, or perhaps something else?
Something much worse,
Much, much more deadly,
Then a terror worse than death,
Much more than loneliness,
Just like regret.

Regret is the voice that sings louder than most,
I know this, though I haven’t known,
What it feels like,
To regret to live.

I am only a child,
Not worth much now,
I don’t know anything,
About myself,
Or about anything, really.

From Confused

Dear Whoever This Concerns,

Why does love burn?

Why does love sting like a little bee?

Why is love so blind that you cannot see?

I ask you why because,

My cheeks right now are red as a rose,

For I do not truly understand,

The love that is as deep as man.

Why is love not unconditional?

Why is love not at all rational?

Whoever This Concerns is a funny name,

My name is like that, one and the same.

Love never stops to catch it’s breath,

Love is black and white as death.

I ask you why and why again,

Why is love as dark as Satan?

Why does love make me oh-so-scared?

Like I was always, but never dared?

I promise you, dear Whoever,

I shall never ever say never.

I also promise this isn’t a ruse,

From your dear, dear, dear Confused.