Bleed through

This sadness I feel, obliterating all else, what is it?  I do not know, and I fear I may never know, forever condemned to searching for answers to this indescribable sadness.  It is hard to believe that a human emotion could possibly be so strong, so prominent.  But I know that there are stronger emotions than this, like despair and hopelessness.  This sadness is not enough.  It is never enough.  Perhaps that is the reason why it is so strong, because it will never truly be enough to sustain one.  I shiver, thinking about the cold sadness and hatred that has consumed me, eating away at me, leaving me with no conceivable way to escape.  I cannot escape from that which is not enough… cannot escape from the inevitable future of my existence.  I am a sorry excuse for life and every day I hate myself because I know that.  I only have to withstand a few more years.  The rest I can bleed through.

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